A Prayer Answered

I woke up last night feeling terrible. I had an awful sore throat, my sinuses were so congested I could hardly breath, my head was pounding from the headache that I felt coming on right before bedtime, and I had a serious pain in my side. It was 2:45 a.m., and I wasn't fully awake, so I had a ton of thoughts running through my head; some rational, some ridiculous. My first thought was "Is the baby okay?" I lay in bed for about five minutes, and the pain would not subside. I thought maybe it was just a gas pain, but figured it was lasting too long. Could it be my appendix? I have no idea which side that hurts on, or what the symptoms are. Could it be something with the baby? No, I thought, the pain is too high in my stomach.

I got up and went downstairs, knowing I wasn't going back to sleep anytime soon. Should I wake The Man? Should we go to the emergency room just in case? That's such a horrible decision to have to make in the middle of the night. What would we do with the girls? Who would I call to ask for help? I decided to wait it out, since the pain was lessening a little. I took some Alka Seltzer, hoping it would help with the headache and sinuses, and sat down on the couch. Laying down only makes it harder to breath, so I knew if I was to get any sleep at all, it would have to be sitting up. 5:30 rolled around and I heard The Man's alarm go off. With such little sleep, I dreaded the morning coming and the girls waking up and needing me.

Somehow I drifted off to sleep by the time he left, because I never even heard him come downstairs. Then I was awakened by my crying Devil Child at 7:00. She wanted cereal. Easy enough. I got up and put some in a baggie, gave her a sippie cup of milk, and put on a movie. Mermaidia is always her first choice. Head still pounding, nose completely stuffed up and body aching, I lay back down hoping to fall back to sleep. By the next time I awoke, Miss Priss had changed the movie to Cars, her latest first choice, and I smelled something awful. Yuck, a poopie diaper. I coax my Devil Child over to where I am, and take off her pajamas to find that they are filled, along with the diaper. I guess that's what I get for not changing her first thing when she gets up. That diaper had no room to hold any more. Still, I think, "Isn't she too old for this kind of explosion?"

I get some cereal and milk for Miss Priss, and it's back to the couch for me, still hoping this headache will go away on its own. I wake up again at 11:30, the girls now watching Jumanji. I normally don't even like it when ONE movie is watched each day. Today, three movies down and it's not even lunchtime, and I DO NOT CARE. I drag myself up for good and decide even if I'm not up to getting ready today, at least the girls should get some regular clothes and get their hair brushed. We take care of that, and then I realize it's time for lunch. Back downstairs for some quick peanut butter and honey sandwiches. It's all I have the strength for.

Afraid that I may be contributing to the possiblity of my children developing ADD or something, I tell them no more movies, and ask them to play upstairs in the toy room while I take a bath. While in the bath, a terrible thought comes to mind. "I haven't felt the baby move since yesterday." I was awake half the night, and on and off all morning. Nothing. I know that's not good, but I can't think of the amount of time you're supposed to wait before you go in. Was it 8 hours? Maybe it was only 5. Then again, maybe it was supposed to be an entire day. I start feeling more and more concerned since this kid is seriously a "mover and a shaker."

I sat in the bath with my eyes closed, holding still so that I could feel even the tiniest movement. And then I prayed. "Come on, just move. Please, just move. I just need to feel ONE movement." Nothing. It doesn't help that two of my good friends have lost their babies in the last few weeks. That's it. I decide that after getting dressed, I will go downstairs and email The Man to tell him I think I should go in and check on the baby. Paranoid? Maybe. But it's been almost an entire day, and a $10 copay for my peace of mind is well worth it.

I sit down to the computer, open up my email, and then I feel it. I think. I'm not expecting it now, so I'm not sure if it's the real thing. I sit back in my chair and wait. It takes just a couple minutes, but then it comes again. And I know that was it. He's moving. And I smile. I say another prayer, this time to say thank you. And all of a sudden, I'm feeling much, much better.